Carefully. Gay porn I wanted it to mean something. Always drawn. It was early morning , the sky a pale gray, the kind of light that slips in gently before the sun shows itself. We just sat there by the couch, side by side, me trying not to freak out, him pretending this was just a chill hang.Halfway through the movie, he turned and looked at me.“Been thinking about this for weeks,” he said.I turned to him. I just stood there, breathing in the familiar smell of his house, the faint cologne he always over-sprayed, the cinnamon from the toaster in the kitchen.He stepped back, narrowed his eyes at me. His hair was messy, like he’d showered and let it air dry.“Happy birthday,” he said, soft smile on his face.I don’t know what I was expecting. Quiet. The curtains drawn. Tongues brushing, lips parting, hands learning each other’s skin.He didn’t rush. Like museum glass, you don’t press too hard. Made me feel more real than I ever had.I came first. Just those familiar eyes, watching me like they always did…like he wanted to say something but never could.“Hey,” he said softly.I said nothing.“I just…” He rubbed the back of his neck.
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